school'saback

I don't know what to make of school. Like so far my mods have been okay, not terrific, but not that bad either, unless you count my el mod which is weird. Just weird, the layout of the classroom is strange because it's L-shaped, with the podium at the right angle of the L and 2 blocks of chairs. The podium faces the door. And because I'm sitting with el majors who know each other and talk a lot, I'm like in the 'rowdy' group of class now HAHAHA joke man. My first lecture made me anxious because I didn't understand any of the questions he was asking. Plus, he reminds me of Mrs S, a lot nicer, certainly, but lol, i just wanna lol (in the ironic sense) at him every time he talks. Hahah and I'm being very deliberately vague here because I can't put the sense of my thoughts into words. "My thoughts are stars I cannot fathom into constellations." A bit self-indulgent, but John Green is infinitely pithy in TFiOS.

Actually went to the deck and ate yong tau foooooo. I was pleasantly surprised at myself because I tend to avoid that corner like the plague, too many people, too much need to make conversation. But I had fun. Turns out Attila the Hun had a brother named "Bleda" HAHAHA which sounds a whole lot like 'bladder' and I bet the reason why we never hear of him is cause he's too ashamed of his name hahahaha oh bleda *wipes eyes*.

Also, I haven't read all my lit texts yet!! I'm panicking inside, but I keep telling myself not to stress cause there's still time. I've read Troilus and Criseyde though, and I loved it. My sister said it was like reading Dr Seuss except in serious verse form hahaha, which is true in a way. I love how they take the concept of a pledge so seriously. Love is love is love, and in some ways its very sweet especially when you compare it to divorce nowadays. And Troilus is adorbzz (I'm being deliberately disgusting and gushy here), like he's too macho to admit to the world that he's in love/ infatuated with the widow Criseyde;  he's afraid that people will laugh at him because he used to laugh at lovers and scorn them. So while he suffers and sighs and burns and pines and perishes, Criseyde is totally unaware, and Troilus just mopes around being hot and adorable and killing Greeks (:

Pandarus on the other hand, Troilus's older friend and Criseyde's uncle reminds me a lot of Mycroft in BBC's Sherlock. And Menenius Agrippa in Coriolanus. The one thing Mycroft and Menenius have in common is that yes, they're both played by Mark Gatiss, but also they are almost fatherly figures to Sherlock and Coriolanus respectively. In T&C, Pandarus is the one who pushes Criseyde Troilus's way after getting Troilus to admit that he's in lurve, because he cannot bear to see his friend suffer, and he thinks that they're good for each other. There is a joyful, mischievous glee he takes in getting Troilus to confess, like a bff or something.

To paraphrase,

Pandarus: booyyy, you betta tell me who she is now! Do I know her?
Troilus (blushing): na-uh, not saying, O M G Pandarus, I am gonna die if I don't have her.
Pandarus (grabs Troilus by his shoulders and starts shaking him): booyy, you promised to tell
Troilus: O M G Pandarus, I am gonna die of shame if I tell you

The actual words,

"Look up I say and tell me who she is
At once, that i may go about your need;
Come, do I know her? Can't you tell me this?
For if i do, there's hope I may succeed.’
A vein in Troilus began to bleed,,
for he was hit, and reddened up in shame.
‘Aha!’ said Pandar, ‘here we start the game.’

125.

And on the word, he gave him a good shaking,
and said: ‘Her name, you thief! You've got to tell!’
And foolish Troilus then started quaking,
as if some fiend were taking him into hell,
and said: ‘The fountain of my woe, my well
Of grief, my sweetest foes, is called Criseyde.'
He trembled at the word, he almost died."

HAHAHA. Chaucer is awesome.