days go by, but still, i'm walking on a wire

stress =.=
i totally forgot about moving the science books
and like for a maths.
logarithms are >.<
i get it but i don't.
paradox.

anyway, the trees are flowering now :3

i love those trees with flowers that droop
in bunches like grapes.
they look like they're dripping gold.

i love those trees with flowers like
gramophones horns made of tissue
in pink and white.
once on a highway that was built around one of those trees;
i saw boughs of flowers
the whole branch was covered in white.
like awesomeee =w=

i envy the primary school
they have an angsana tree right outside
that's blooming thick clumps of yellow flowers
i want a tree like that too.

i love the sky.
if i could paint properly,
i would be painting the sky forever.
today huge dark blue clouds sat in the sky
and behind it, was a wonderful orange yellow and pink.
the sun was shining but the clouds were casting shadows.
it looked like some conflict brewing up there
as if the sky couldn't make up its mind on what to wear.
even the sky is a paradox.

sometimes i feel unbalanced.
not because i'm missing my big toe(s)
(cause your big toes balance you)
and not because i have some ear infection
(cause your balance is somewhere in your middle ear and once that balance is lost, it makes you giddy or something like that)
but cause i have to divide my time into smaller pieces of time.
i have to divide my time between awake and sleep.
i have to divide my sleep into blank and dreams.
i have to divide when i'm awake into
school=homework; or shooting
i have to divide my homework into different subjects.
during shooting, i have to divide yet give equal attention to
myself and the target.
sometimes i feel like the target.

someone today, said:
we give the best we can
and whatever we do, always expect more.
its probably inspirational
but on the other hand its a downer.
why can't we sit and watch the world go by once more?

so she said now what's the problem baby;
what's the problem i don't know...